February 4, 2025

Generational trauma often leads us to unconsciously repeat patterns from our family history. It’s essential to reflect on these behaviors to break the cycle. It’s essential to reflect on the ways we might be unconsciously repeating patterns from our family history. Consider how you handle conflicts with your daughter. Are you adopting the same strategies your mother used with you? Similarly, examine your relationships with others—are they mirroring the unhealthy dynamics your grandmother experienced? And don’t forget self-care; are you neglecting your own needs while prioritizing others, just as you observed growing up?

Maria had always told herself that she was strong. Her survival demanded it. As a child, she learned that tears didn’t fix anything, that silence was safer, and that anger was something to be swallowed, not expressed. She carried these lessons into adulthood, and later into motherhood. Maria’s daughter, Eva, was different. She was sensitive, inquisitive, and freely shared her feelings. But Maria struggled to comfort her daughter—especially when Eva’s frustrations spilled over into slammed doors and tearful pleas. “Why won’t you let me express my feelings? Why do you always shut down?” Eva would say.

Recognize that these patterns can profoundly affect your daughter’s path to self-discovery and fulfillment, just as they did/didn’t for you. She is absorbing and internalizing everything around her, shaping her understanding of relationships, emotional expression, and self-worth. This means she may develop similar coping mechanisms, communication styles, and self-care habits. By becoming aware of these patterns, you can break the cycle and guide her towards healthier, more empowering ways of being. Encourage her to express her emotions openly, prioritize her needs, and form positive, supportive relationships. Your conscious effort to change these patterns will not only benefit you but also pave the way for her to lead a more fulfilling and balanced life.

Remember, you’re a warrior and a conqueror. Breaking generational trauma is not only something you deserve; it’s also in your power to achieve.

Your strength and resilience will transform your life and create a legacy of healing and empowerment for future generations. You’re already on the right path by seeking to understand and address these issues. Keep moving forward with courage and determination, knowing that every step you take brings you closer to the freedom and happiness you deserve.

No one had ever asked her that. The question settled deep, stirring something fragile inside her. She looked at her daughter—so much like herself, yet so much braver.

For the first time, Maria didn’t dismiss it. She sat down beside Eva, exhaled, and whispered, “No, I was not allowed. Yes, I learned to bottle up my feelings. And I think I don’t know how to stop.”

Eva reached for her mother’s hand. “Maybe we figure it out together.”